Ah, that new relationship feeling. It’s full of butterflies, smiles, secret looks, and fizzy energy that makes you want to melt into each other when you touch. It’s all lust and warm feelings in secret places and we all lap it up. It makes sense: a new relationship is exciting, it’s new and it’s going to make you feel good, so why not immerse yourself in it?
There are some conversations that you two crazy kids need to get on with having, however, the earlier you do it the better. Before you get in too deep, there are things that you need to know about one another, from learning about STD testing and new partners you’ve both had recently, to the intimate discussions about trauma in your past (if there is any). Any new relationship has its road bumps, but communication should never be one of them. Below, we’ve put together a list of things that you lovebirds should be talking about before you deep dive into bed together.
Believe it or not, this isn’t a passion killer of a conversation! Talking about whether you have each ordered STD testing online is smart. No one wants to pick up a dose of syphilis when they are enjoying themselves, and this clears it up that you are both clear from any STDs. STD testing and with new partners may feel awkward, but it’s far more awkward to have to tell them that you have an STD after the fact.
The next conversation you should consider having is the one about your goals together. What are your limits? What are your boundaries? What is a no and what is a yes? This conversation can happen over text if you can’t manage it face to face, but some people have boundaries that need to be in place before clothes come off. Any hard limits you have sexually should be discussed because your new partner isn’t going to know what is okay or not unless you tell them. Communication is important. Half the fun of sex is in talking about it beforehand.
So, you’ve both been tested and you’re both disease-free. The next conversation has to be about methods of protection for when you do get between the sheets. Your wishes for protection don’t stop just because you’re both clear of STDs. There’s unwanted pregnancy to consider, and the pill doesn’t prevent pregnancy 100%. Double-bagging your protection with a hormonal method plus condoms is the way to go and you should have this conversation early.
For some people, casual sex is what it is: a time spent together where you have fun and that’s the end of it. For others, sex means so much more than that and if that is how sex is for you, this should be communicated early. This prevents you from being hurt when the other person doesn’t call you afterward. There is a lot of expectation surrounding sex, but knowing what you want from each other makes the whole thing far sweeter.
The best thing that you can do is head to rapidstdtesting.com for STD testing online and ensure that you are both ready for this next step!